What defines you? The breadth of your results, the depth of your relationships, or both?
Breadth is easier and quicker to measure – it is not so hard to tell whether you are making progress or not because of how fast it seems.
Depth is harder and takes longer to measure – it is hard to tell whether you are making progress or not because of how slow it seems.
A child can be acing courses in school while dealing with a broken home, drawing immediate envy but being set up for long-term catastrophe.
An adult can be a high-flyer at work while being an absent spouse at home, again drawing immediate envy but being set up for long-term catastrophe.
As with all structures, it is best to build depth before breadth, because the only breadth that endures is the one with the right supporting depth.
Too many brilliant children have been handicapped in the long run by dysfunctional homes. They spend most of their adult lives trying to fix a foundation that cannot hold the magnificent building they have erected. Parents must choose better, intentionally.
Too many brilliant adults have been handicapped in the long run by dysfunctional spouses. They spend their lives trying out different masks to get through life, never really seeing the glow of their own face. Spouses must choose each other, intentionally.
Everyone struggles with either depth or breadth in different phases of their lives. But it is always easier to recover breadth, so pay more attention to the harder thing – depth.
– Osasu Oviawe