I have found it strange that people who speak the most about the importance of love languages do not actually speak their own love language.

Maybe it stems from the fact that people do not necessarily love themselves as much as they want to be loved by others.

For clarity the five love languages as described by Gary Chapman are –

1. Words of affirmation.
2. Quality time.
3. Receiving gifts.
4. Acts of service.
5. Physical touch.

If you say your love languages include words of affirmation, I would expect you to speak words of affirmation to yourself often.

If your love language includes receiving gifts, I would expect you to gift yourself often.

If your love language is physical touch, I would expect you to touch yourself often. A naughty proposition, but at least show that self care or grooming is your priority.

The love languages should not be a window through which you judge other people, but a mirror in which you see yourself.

People learn to speak the language they already see you speaking, if they want to be with you. Of course, they start up speaking their own language, but they ultimately learn yours and speak yours when you clearly own yours.

By chance you might meet someone that speaks all your love languages fluently, and you hit it off immediately. The odds of that are slim though.

Better to work with the mode. Speak your love language to yourself first. It will help you to be understanding when your lover is in the process of learning it.

– Osasu Oviawe